Anywhere but Here

And so it begins...

my head spins and my thoughts wonder. Everything I'm starting to watch and see and read is reminding me all too well how close this deployments coming. I hate to sound whiny or whatever because I know that this is what he signed up to do. I also know that he chose to go this time and I'm okay with that, but I still can't help myself and think he's not gonna be here. I'm not going to have to pick up his clothes from the bathroom floor, see his toothbrush by the sink, or steal the covers from him in the middle of the night. I'm not saying that I can't do things on my own while he's away but it's the small things that I'm already missing. It's him not watching our daughter grow and develop for 7 months, or cuddling with on the couch after work winding down for the day. Him not being on stupid You Tube looking at truck burnouts or comedy clips, or even his ebay browsing for the truck he may or may not want when he gets back. Like I said, I know what we've chosen and why, I just can't help but miss the small things, even the stupid things of our life. I already miss him and he's not even gone yet. I was watching P.S. I Love You today with Hilary Swank and I think that's where a lot of this is coming from. Watching the movie and seeing her be without him was so sad and for some reason I thought about us. Of course it's not completley the same but it's similar. lol. IDK. I guess while he's away I'm lost without him except this time I can't just do nothing. I have to pull it together and take care of our daughter by myself. It's the life we chose, I know. I'm just saying.

*sigh* Okay now that that is out there and I've vented just a little bit I can move on and tell you about our munchkin.

I am 33.3 weeks this week and still counting down to her delivery. I feel like I'm huge already. I've been lucky up to this point and haven't grown too much and then all of a sudden this last trimester I kind of just bloated out and all of a sudden my belly was ALL baby. lol. She moves so so much right now and I love it, except for the nights I can't sleep cause she's bouncy off the walls or when her head is in my pelvic so bad it hurts. lol. I have a small amount of insomnia and aches and pains but according to my midwife all symptoms are normal at this point. It's just the little one and my body preparing for D-day. I can not wait for it already. I want her to be here already and to have my body back and normal and less achey. lol. Although, I'm sure every pregnant lady wants that by this point. lol. Cross your fingers and hope that she comes early. =)

I guess that's all for now. I'll blog again soon....

Labels: Babies, Deployments, Marines

posted by Inkedfemme @ 2:06 PM